The Angry Young Man

Ah, the ethical and moral quandaries that arise out of living with other human beings.

As reported in our last episode, one of my house mates at Maison le Trou, Redondo, has decided to vacate our lovely home and move in with his boyfriend of 4 months, Big Spender (BS for short). My other flatmate, Elisabeth, and I have been expecting this for sometime as the minute Redondo met BS, they latched onto one another like a couple love sick barnacles and we’ve seen neither hide nor hair of either since. Anyway, come April, he’s out of here.

My initial reaction was to take up his share of the rent, turn his room into my bedroom and my room into an office/living area. I can afford it, so why the hell not? Then, it was pointed out to me that if I can afford to pay for two rooms in Maison le Trou, I can surely pay for my own apartment – perhaps one that is less moldy and decrepit. The thing about my current flat is that it’s dank and run down. The floors are rotting out and on occasion we’re forced to vanquish the pervasive odor of mildew by burning scented oils from the Body Shop. However, it’s in a great location and it’s dirt cheap. That’s saying a lot for San Francisco, where greedy slumlords lurk on every street corner, ready to rent you bedbug infested spider pits for thousands of American dollars a month.

I’ve made attempts to fix the place up. For example, I painted the bathroom. Before, it was a dank hole in the wall, the paint peeling from the walls in great leprous sheets. Now, well, it looks like the restroom at CBGB, and still manages to be an improvement. I was thinking of hanging a Mao sized portrait of Nancy Spungen on the wall to help complete the look. Basically, it’s hopeless. The only thing that’ll improve the place is a machine gun,. A can of gasoline, and a torch.

So, after talking to Bill, I decided to move out come May 1, and get my own place deep in the heart of the Tenderloin. Now, I’m not so sure. I spoke with Elisabeth last night and it was clear that she is somewhat distressed by the current shift in our apartment’s dynamic. Thing is, she’s lived here for 15 years. She can’t afford to leave the place as rents have skyrocketed since that time and her salary has not kept pace. At the time she moved in, the lease was held by this dirty filthy hippie named Eddie the Hippie. Keep in mind that Eddie the Hippie moved out of here over 4 years ago and pays no rent. Now, the lease reverted to month to month before Elisabeth arrived. The building has changed owners over the years and no one knows to whom this apartment has been leased. Eddie the Hippie seems to think that he’s still the master tenant. He still has keys to the place and gets some of his mail here. He came in last summer, saw me here, and freaked out that Elisabeth and Redondo had rented my room without consulting him. Seems he had cooked up some scam to overcharge folks for rent so he could pocket the money. I’m telling you, this guy is the scum of the earth. He tried to kick me out and move in some useless dirtbag drug dealer. Elisabeth stood up to him and he backed down. Still, he feels like this is his place and until someone can come along and say otherwise, there’s not a whole lot we can do about it beyond confronting the bastard, calling the cops to have him removed, avoiding him in public, etc. I told Elisabeth that the fact that she’s been paying the rent for the last 4 years represents a contract in lieu of the actual lease – in consideration for the flat, she hands over her American dollars. Whatever agreement Eddie had with the landlord ceased to be legitimate when he moved out/stopped paying the rent. No consideration, no deal. He’s seriously mistaken if he thinks we’re subletting from him. I also told Elisabeth that she needs to contact the landlord, get a copy of the lease, change the locks, sign a new lease if necessary, and get rid of this idiotic Eddie the Hippie once and for all. I’m dubious that Elisabeth will do any of this, she’s that afraid of rocking the boat. She’s also afraid of what Eddie the Hippie will do. Apparently the guy is a raging alcoholic/drug addict with a violent streak. Sweet.

I feel obligated to stay until this situation has been resolved. I like Elisabeth and I don’t want to leave her high and dry. I guess the best course of action is to find a new flatmate to replace Redondo and then wait a couple months to find a replacement for myself. I’m not exactly eager to fork out twice my monthly rent for more space in this dank hole of a hovel. At the same time, I’m concerned about how difficult it may be to attract quality humans to move in here. What to do?